random stories

2007-08-23T19:26:00.000-07:00

Just Leave

Stop invading what isn't yours
I hate when you talk down to me
I have these things that I call chores
but all you do is patronize.

I fight this battle all alone
you push me further from my goal
though motives good and to love you're prone
all youre doing is tearing me down.

This knife was stabbed through my heart
all the bleeding I tried to hide
but you had to make it overt
and now I'm the one in the wrong.

The little bit is taken away
all you do is laugh in my face
you tell me all my wrongs today
all I want to do is scream.

I thought that to you I could turn
but apparently I was wrong
My dignity you spent to burn
I'm sorry but I need you to leave.

8~23~07

2007-08-17T18:22:00.000-07:00

Lost

I know not who my enemies are
the dust has cleared but the road is gone
these voices scream "go left!" "go right!"
but all I want to do is STOP.

STOP, go back to that treasured world
where life and love was ne'er so cold
but ripped away it was from me
pulled right from beneath my feet.
I've been pushed down, my wind knocked out
and I'm sick of my consequences.

I thought my choice would fix the bad
my selfish heart wouldn't let you be
I stole your joy, with hate was clad,
and stained my hope of an innocent plea.

I'm sorry all the pain I've caused
I'ts the only way that I knew how...
All common sense in my head paused...
I masked my fear that I'd allowed.

A fear of loss, yet not of you
that's for your other half to-be
but to never have you to lose
is what makes my stomach flee.

Crystal Kerr
8-17-07
DED2SB

2007-05-19T22:07:00.000-07:00

For You

The puppetries you claim to see

are just about to be cut free.

The strings & ropes & leather holds

are taken away, or so you're told.

But still it seems you're in the dark.

All you've said is on the mark.

The fighting & screaming has gotten old.

Your future, in their hands, they hold.

You fight & cry & hurt inside,

but by their rules you must abide.

Things progress from bad to worse

and still remains your silent curse.

No room to speak, nowhere to run;

no pleasantries, no time for fun.

You come to me in need of care

and so for you - my time I'll spare.

I'm here right now - forever too;

I'll be here always - Just For You.

Crystal Kerr

5-18-07

DED2CC

2007-04-27T19:17:00.000-07:00

Strangled Love

My Strangled love
it suffers so
i feel so lost
where will i go?

youve a kind heart
youve a warm smile
they only last
so short a while.

The midnight sky
so cold and dark
as i await
your warm remark.

I feel as though
a wire wraps
around my heart
creating gaps.

The holes, they fill
with pain so deep
that yet again
my eyes, they weep.

My love, so strong
outstretched to you
but walls obscure
my mood turns blue.

A waterfall
so tall and clear
falls from my eyes
throughout the year.

The seasons change
the days go by
for you i yearn
but still i sigh.

The time, unwilling
to change its pace
so childhood
im forced to face.

The time when laws
and rules forbode
me to carry
so great a load.

Which is a burden?
What one is worse?
the pain of love,
or my silent curse?

I call your name
my voice so loud
but always lost
within the crowd.

My strangled love
is lost again
so now ill try
to use my pen.

My words may never
reach your ears
but at least they'll last
throughout the years.

When not a child
maybe someday
ill come to you
ill smile and say:

Although unknown,
you made me cry,
i felt a pain
that made me sigh

I felt so lost
there i waited
for my heart to
be ungated.

I loved you then
and always will
so hold me tight,
dont let me chill.

So will you let
my love strangle?
let my heart from
your hand dangle?

I need a cure
for strangled love.
a cure from you,
from up above.

Crystal Kerr
12-19-05
DED2DJ

2006-11-14T21:04:00.000-08:00

"Take Me Away"

Fly me high, to touch the sky.

Let me watch the birds up high.

Take me where i want to be,

lead me out above the sea.

The air is moving, oh, so fast.

The days are turning to the past.

I wish someone would take my hand,

and lead me out above the land.

I want to drift to that place,

where clouds change like colorless lace.

Up, to drift above the land,

where memories shift just like the sand.

The door is locked, it needs a key.

So wont you please hand it to me?

For, only you can take me there,

with hazel eyes and dark brown hair.

12-12-05

2006-11-14T20:46:00.000-08:00

"Something New"

You whispered "I love you",

but it didnt sink in.

Having only been heard

from next of kin.

I didnt realize what you meant

by what you had to say;

Only to find that afternoon

that over me, you held sway.

The words you spoke,

showing how you felt,

they were so new to me

and made me melt.

I dont need to wish on stars,

my wish has come true.

I have nothing else to ask;

I already have you.

Perhaps what I'll wish for

is a butterfly net:

To catch the ones that

in my stomach have set.

Because when i look up

and you smile at me,

the butterflies show up

and I turn red for all to see.

Love is confusing to me,

this feeling is new.

But i know i'll get through it

as long as i have you.

9-28-06

2005-12-08T19:03:00.000-08:00

~The Perfect Murder~

Anger flared up in her eyes. hatred shone through every crack and crevice of her skin. there was only one answer to her problems... only one way to fix it. she had to kill him. over the next two weeks she watched him. followed him home. watched him from a distance. discovered his daily routine. she knew where he brushed his teeth, did his laundry, where he slept at night, where his friends lived, where they hung out. she began to work out her plan. his mom worked graveyard shift. she left at 6:30 on monday through wednesday, friday, and saturday. his dad flew to D.C. every other friday and came back on monday nights. she decided friday night would be best. he usualy went out on fridays with his friends so he wouldnt be missed until sunday morning. she got everything ready. white gloves. hair net. alcohol. large garbage bags. it would be fast and simple. she waited outside his house until he saw both his mom and dad leave the house. she walked to the door. unlocked, she walked into the house. he had been on his computer with headphones on when she saw him from outside. she crept up behind him, silently, slowly, calmly. hair net and gloves in place, she stood behind him. she quickly grabbed his head and twisted, instantly breaking his neck. she caught his weight before he fell to the floor. as she had suspected, she had some blood on her arm. she dragged the lifeless body into the hallway where the bags and alcohol were. she cleaned off any trace of her DNA or his from their bodies and carefully placed him in the bags. she then proceded to drag him outside to her car. she drove to the river and dumped him. her job was finished. she began her long drive home and.... "dinner time!" her mom called. "okay!" she said... angry that her bitter dream of revenge was over.

~*~Golf Sox~*~

2005-10-17T21:28:00.000-07:00

~Unexpected~

The pain of regret and rejection was tearing her apart. it showed on her face. the agony within was more than she could bear. the loss of a friend. the loss of a love. the loss of a hope. the loss of a dream. it seemed like no one cared anymore. she avoided eye contact as he walked out the doors. she thought, if i keep looking down, he will walk straight to the bus, we wont make eye contact, and i wont have to think about him. she watched his feet pass, then stop and turn. she looked up. his peircing eyes looked into hers. "hey. whats up" he said to her. her heart raced. everything she had assumed, all she had been led to believe, was false. she struggled for words. "uhm... not much... you?" "eh.. nothing. did you skip school yesterday?" he asked. she was startled by the question she hadnt thought of herself as 'skipping', but it sounded good "ya, i slept in and just didnt go." "ya... me either." he replied. she was confused, if he wasnt at school either how did he know she wasnt? he must have asked someone. he must have been interested. "well i gotta go... ill see ya later." he walked away. "bye." she said. he turned and smiled.

~*~Golf Sox~*~

2005-10-12T22:47:00.000-07:00

~Road of Loneliness~

why do i walk down this road? this road of loneliness. i follow the footsteps i see. the ones on the ground of others before me. some go on forever, deeply pressed into the ground. they lead to a paradise of eternal happiness. but i just see it as a web of lies. simply candy made up for the eyes. there are so many different paths that i could take but the footsteps blend together now not showing me the way. i know not to be lead by the footsteps blown away by the wind, they lead into the darkness not lasting very long. why is there no one with me following these paths? why would these clues be left for only me? i need someome to hold my hand and guide me through this empty world. i need someone with me in the night, to tell me they care, that its alright. someone to hold me when im scared, for comfort when im lonely. but there seems to be no one here on this journey down a lonely road. sometimes i think i hear your voice, carried to me upon the wind, but everytime i turn around i feel that cold and im still alone. ill continue down this endless road until our paths do meet. i will walk down this empty road, this road of loneliness.

~*~Golf Sox~*~

2005-10-12T22:46:00.000-07:00

~Doors~

I try to talk to you but you turn and hide, but when i look into your eyes and you look into mine its like everything just seems to stop and for a moment you are mine. you say we're just friends but it feels like so much more. but disappointment lingers behind every door. if i take the first door its the easy way out, i let you go and hope that it all works out. we stay friends, no more no less... the second door, could be so much more, if only you would let me in, but you say, were just friends, and the disappointment seeps in again. door three, well that would be the end, and if i took that door then disappointment would come from me... i take door one, but only for our friendships sake... i couldn't stand to hurt you.. but then theres always that big 'what if' what if id taken that door... that door number 2? then maybe id have you, maybe id be happy, maybe we could be. but disappointment is the only thing that lingers... behind all doors is disappointment.

~*~Golf Sox~*~

2005-10-12T22:17:00.000-07:00

~Camping~

i stared into the fire. the crackle of it only made me think deeper. i was drowning in my thoughts. i heard a zipper but paid no mind. a twig snapped. i tensed. he walked into the glow of the fire. "couldnt sleep," he said to me, "i heard you get up after i went to bed." "sorry if ive been keeping you up." i told him. "no, i was thinking. i was keeping myself up." "heh, ya i know what thats like. ive been thinking a lot too... i like to let my mind wander, give it a little exersize." a silence followed. we sat out there for 45 minutes watching the fire. i got a strange feeling like someone was watching me so i looked up. our eyes met, i realized it was him who was staring at me. our eyes locked on each other, i couldnt look away. i was in a trance, the flames licking at the sky, the eerie shadows cast on our faces, his piercing eyes staring into mine. my heart began to race but then he smiled, and suddenly i knew that this was the best camping trip ever.

~*~Golf Sox~*~

2005-10-12T21:05:00.000-07:00

~Stranded~

the sand caused the sun to beat back up into our faces like a mirror. we had to find shade and make shelter. we scavenged the area of the wreck but found only an amount of rope, some netting, some canned foods, and a few suitcases. we were the only survivors. the others had been trapped inside and burned to death. he and i barely escaped. he collected wood and anything else he found usefull and i went to find food. the island was abundant with fruits but meat was rare. we knew we had to save the fire we had from the wreck so we made a pit on the beach right away. as night set in we settled down. as the stars came out i sat on the beach away from the fire. surprisingly he walked over and sat next to me. i wanted nothing more but to embrace him. he looked into my eyes and told me we would make it, that it would be fine. thats when i knew things were gonna be ok.

~*~Golf Sox~*~

2005-10-12T18:04:00.000-07:00

~Daydreams~

The music got louder. she could feel the beat pounding at her soul. the strange ritual began. her hair, long like curtains and dark like a summer night sky, fell all around her face. she bent and contorted her body like the wind blowing the grass. her feet in a sea of shadows cast by the immense skirt about her waist, adorned by a diamond-like chain. the music became faster, her heart beat louder in her head, the faces became blurred all around her. their eyes met. she stopped dead in her tracks. she slowly walked towards him. hips moving back and forth, eyes seducing, satisfying every fantasy in his mind. her body thrust against his, eyes locked, minds racing. a lip lock only inches away. BRRRIIIIINNNNGGG! the bell rang. it was only a dream. lunchtime.

~*~Golf Sox~*~